golde, do you love me?

One of the great pleasures of performing stand-up comedy is the being able to tell another person to go fuck him or herself. I mean, perhaps it differs from person to person, but it’s rare that I feel that I get to say such a thing in my real life, making it just that much more interesting and enjoyable when on stage.

Of course, it’s not at all that I would ever choose to have such a drunk in the front row. Or such an interaction. But sometimes it’s Boxing Day and you jump off a train and head straight to the show and it’s in the bar of a youth hostel and some Aussie kid on his apparent quite drunken vacation has nothing better to do.

The guy had been talking through all of the comics and couldn't have given a shit about anyone else in the room. He decided to start up about 45 seconds into my own time. What follows is about maybe a quarter of the set.

Hecklers are an unusually wretched, ignorant, unpleasant bunch. Thoughtless, mostly.